I Have Something to Say!

Stephen King is teaching me to be very direct with my writing.  Write as if you are just “saying it!”  I am not sure where the moon is at right now but I am very emoji.  Yesterday while I was waiting on the Marble guy to show up, I stood at the salon door watching a very, VERY old man and his beautiful wife who had clearly had a stroke.  She was in the wheelchair all dressed up with her hair and clothes, very old school JcPenney like.  

They were leaving lunch.  He was helping her get in the car as slowly and gently as you could imagine.  Time for me froze at that moment. No one was around.  No music, no dancing, no laughing, nothing.  Just me, starting out the window in one of the busiest places of my life and I wanted to drop right to my knees and sob.  Sob like someone had died or just left me.

I tell you all that and I write because I have too.  I want too and I need to.  My heart cannot contain what I am going through when I get up in the morning and I am going to blast you with my full story one day.  And I know only a few of you will read this and only a few more of you will care, if any.  I bet there are two but my life story may just be worth reading soon.

Social Medial has allowed me to reach a circle of 500 Friends and another 900 by way of my trade.  But most days, I see two or three friends at best and usually the same ones.  (For which I could not be more thankful for).

And I get out of this bed knowing I have a HUGE world of faces adorning my life everyday, (real or otherwise).  I eef-ing love them.  

So I practice writing with meditative goals in mind.  To find a higher Love and a higher thinking than my before days.  My before and after picture of life is a picture of a crazy, wild women.  Happy, Sad.  Busy, in Awe.  Fat, Skinny.  Been them all.  But when I stopped yesterday (which is gone) and saw that man adorn his sick wife with all of his attention and nothing in the world meant more to him than to get her safely in the car, it made my heart crack.  I miss my husband and he is not by my side today.  He is busy too.  

So I decided to reach out in my blog and pretend someone was with me in Spirit.  Someone who really understood what I am going through without knowing all the details and your going, ah.

It is storming right now.  And it is Spring.  I am finding ways to combat the hard places in life and sometimes, I do stupid stuff by not paying close attention to my thoughts, emoji’s and my body.  But right now, RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW, I am writing to solve that.  Setting my intention for today and praying my future is safe.  And if I am lucky, I will live lives cycles along with the moon and stars and Divine Christ Love and just be considered “weird.” 🙂

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